Giant Sand - The Love Songs (1989)
Giant Sand - Swerve (1990)
"The convoluted wording of legalisms grew up around the necessity to hide from ourselves the violence we intend toward each other. Between depriving a man of one hour from his life and depriving him of his life there exists only a difference of degree. You have done violence to him, consumed his energy. Elaborate euphemisms may conceal your intent to kill, but behind any use of power over another the ultimate assumption remains: 'I feed on your energy.'
- Frank Herbert, Dune Messiah (1969)
March 30, 2007
What You Do When There Is Nothing You Can Do
Velvet Monkeys - Rotting Corpse au Go-Go (1989)
The spacelords blew into the system in fancy-ass transwarp multigeneration leather bucket seat and airconditioned starships, mucking up and down and all around in every possible dimension, space-Euro-trash in knockoff Gucci life-support belts, showing off their fancy power steering and blasting their bass-heavy technomusic (all bad Kraftwerk disco imitation crap) on every channel until finally we'd just had enough. (The last straw was when they pulled up to Mars and ordered ten-thousand cappucinos then left without paying!) We pulled out the planets, ran in the asteroid belt, put out the sun and left. It was easier than living with them.
The spacelords blew into the system in fancy-ass transwarp multigeneration leather bucket seat and airconditioned starships, mucking up and down and all around in every possible dimension, space-Euro-trash in knockoff Gucci life-support belts, showing off their fancy power steering and blasting their bass-heavy technomusic (all bad Kraftwerk disco imitation crap) on every channel until finally we'd just had enough. (The last straw was when they pulled up to Mars and ordered ten-thousand cappucinos then left without paying!) We pulled out the planets, ran in the asteroid belt, put out the sun and left. It was easier than living with them.
You Can Put Your Fist Up In The Air, But Be Prepared
The Jody Grind - One Man's Trash Is Another Man's Treasure (1990)
Particle spin decay spoofing, every teen's favorite game, just like Pac-Man, just like Pong, just like being a highschool bully in a pond, making babies random, making phone calls too, bleeding out of every hole, it's every teen's favorite game.
Particle spin decay spoofing, every teen's favorite game, just like Pac-Man, just like Pong, just like being a highschool bully in a pond, making babies random, making phone calls too, bleeding out of every hole, it's every teen's favorite game.
March 29, 2007
The Interior Mechanical Mind Of A Trouser Press
Lemonheads - Creator (1988)
Up, down, smash, hiss! Up, down, smash, hiss! Up, down, smash, hiss! "I'm such a lucky fella, such a lucky fella, to have a job I love!" Up, down, smash, hiss!
Up, down, smash, hiss! Up, down, smash, hiss! Up, down, smash, hiss! "I'm such a lucky fella, such a lucky fella, to have a job I love!" Up, down, smash, hiss!
Random Night Thoughts Of the Undead
Eleventh Dream Day - Lived to Tell (1991)
Nothing feeds the soul better than another soul, thought Tiny Vlad, the world's smallest vampire according to the Guinness Book of Supernatural Records. This distinction aside, TV was not happy. He was barely large enough to put the bite on a guinea pig and guinea pigs are notorious for the stinginess of their interior lives. One cannot survive on such small-minded creatures. Someday, someday, somebody would hit him with wooden ruler or a toothpick and that'd be the end.
Nothing feeds the soul better than another soul, thought Tiny Vlad, the world's smallest vampire according to the Guinness Book of Supernatural Records. This distinction aside, TV was not happy. He was barely large enough to put the bite on a guinea pig and guinea pigs are notorious for the stinginess of their interior lives. One cannot survive on such small-minded creatures. Someday, someday, somebody would hit him with wooden ruler or a toothpick and that'd be the end.
Never Think Too Much When You Can Play Guitar Instead
Pussy Galore - Right Now! (1987)
Jerry was a man-beetle, but what kind of man-beetle was the puzzle. He had chitinous armor, an exoskeleton, mandibles, six lovely limbs, hind wings, a scuttling quality of mind and an array of sensory equipment no non-beetle could possibly possess. That ruled out the non-beetle man-beetle theory. And what a thorax! Golden, glistening - the ladies loved Jerry's thorax! But a thorax does not a man-beetle make and while he pondered his loneliness and his special destiny, the puzzle of his man-beetlehood, he really should have been learning to play guitar. Ladies like guitar players even better.
Jerry was a man-beetle, but what kind of man-beetle was the puzzle. He had chitinous armor, an exoskeleton, mandibles, six lovely limbs, hind wings, a scuttling quality of mind and an array of sensory equipment no non-beetle could possibly possess. That ruled out the non-beetle man-beetle theory. And what a thorax! Golden, glistening - the ladies loved Jerry's thorax! But a thorax does not a man-beetle make and while he pondered his loneliness and his special destiny, the puzzle of his man-beetlehood, he really should have been learning to play guitar. Ladies like guitar players even better.
March 28, 2007
Some Things Are Best Not Examined Too Closely, Like Belly Button Lint
Dinosaur Jr. - Dinosaur (1985)
Molten planetoid-sized chunks of former planet flew past the satellite station, so far successfully deflected by its screens, but Raymond knew there was a chunk out there with his name on it. The scientists had gone too far, evidently, drilled too deep, examined too closely, angered something too greatly. Didn't matter now, really. He sipped his vodka and coffee - the last of both - and let his fingers idly trail across the control panel. "Eeny, meeny, miny..." he whispered, pinky finger over the screen's power button. "Moe." Like there was another choice.
Molten planetoid-sized chunks of former planet flew past the satellite station, so far successfully deflected by its screens, but Raymond knew there was a chunk out there with his name on it. The scientists had gone too far, evidently, drilled too deep, examined too closely, angered something too greatly. Didn't matter now, really. He sipped his vodka and coffee - the last of both - and let his fingers idly trail across the control panel. "Eeny, meeny, miny..." he whispered, pinky finger over the screen's power button. "Moe." Like there was another choice.
He Hated His Dreams, His Falling Asleep
Husker Du - New Day Rising (1985) [Post #100!]
He had no arms to put inside the cavern mouth, to pull out the shining diamond and clay dog within. It barked and barked at him with rays of light shining out its throat, salty with desire to run free across the lawns and call him Master. Together they cried, he with his head against the hole and it within, eyes glittering with love.
He had no arms to put inside the cavern mouth, to pull out the shining diamond and clay dog within. It barked and barked at him with rays of light shining out its throat, salty with desire to run free across the lawns and call him Master. Together they cried, he with his head against the hole and it within, eyes glittering with love.
March 23, 2007
A Cigar, A Whiskey And A Headless Barbie: Christmas, 1967
Young Fresh Fellows - When We Were Good (1988)
"Forever and again, the alvar were gnawing at the quantum walls of their prison.
Down where photonic light itself was too gross to serve as a basis for perception, they raged to be free. Ceaselessly shifting congeries of forms, interpenetrating shuggoths, they scratched and clawed in the basement of the cosmos like dissatisfied servants, seeking an entrance to the bright and happy privileged realms above."
- Rudy Rucker and Paul Di Filippo, "Elves of the Subdimensions" (2006)
"Forever and again, the alvar were gnawing at the quantum walls of their prison.
Down where photonic light itself was too gross to serve as a basis for perception, they raged to be free. Ceaselessly shifting congeries of forms, interpenetrating shuggoths, they scratched and clawed in the basement of the cosmos like dissatisfied servants, seeking an entrance to the bright and happy privileged realms above."
- Rudy Rucker and Paul Di Filippo, "Elves of the Subdimensions" (2006)
Clockwatching Is An Unhealthy Hobby
Roger Miller - Maximum Electric Piano ~ The Big Industry (1987)
Tiny little fingers, no thicker than the idea of hair, no longer than a baby's toenail, but millions per limb, gave the indigenous inhabitants of the newly-discovered world the rare ability to physically grasp time itself. Which came in handy after they discovered the true nature of their new 'friends' from another world.
Tiny little fingers, no thicker than the idea of hair, no longer than a baby's toenail, but millions per limb, gave the indigenous inhabitants of the newly-discovered world the rare ability to physically grasp time itself. Which came in handy after they discovered the true nature of their new 'friends' from another world.
Have You Heard The One...?
Universal Congress Of - Prosperous and Qualified (1988)
The Wolfman, Frankenstein and Dracula walk into a bar...
The Wolfman, Frankenstein and Dracula walk into a bar...
There Is No Other Possible Explanation...For Anything
Moe Tucker - I Spent A Week There The Other Night (1993)
Without the gravitic restraints, young Thomas Jefferson would never have survived when the saucer crashed. Dazed and lonely, his memories of his earlier life completely obliterated by the trauma, the poor little alien boy was taken in by kindly plantation owners who raised him as their own and set him on his illustrious career path.
Without the gravitic restraints, young Thomas Jefferson would never have survived when the saucer crashed. Dazed and lonely, his memories of his earlier life completely obliterated by the trauma, the poor little alien boy was taken in by kindly plantation owners who raised him as their own and set him on his illustrious career path.
March 20, 2007
God, Gold And Guns: The Three G's Of The Apocalypse
The Minutemen - Double Nickels On the Dime (1984)
The Queen considered Columbus' request, his wavy hair, well-filled hose, firm backside. She glanced sidelong at - ugh! - Ferdinand, and allowed herself to make a decision she would regret for the rest of her life.
- For D. Boon, 1958-1985. Still missed, still needed, now more than ever.
The Queen considered Columbus' request, his wavy hair, well-filled hose, firm backside. She glanced sidelong at - ugh! - Ferdinand, and allowed herself to make a decision she would regret for the rest of her life.
- For D. Boon, 1958-1985. Still missed, still needed, now more than ever.
March 19, 2007
Somewhen, An Encyclopedia Is Missing An Entry
Somewhere, Allen Funt Is Laughing
Penguin Cafe Orchestra - Signs of Life (1987)
The tittering sorcerer fondled the unlaughing demoness, fingertips tingling in her black electric aura, enchanted by her sparking breasts. "How much, how much!" he cried. "More than you can afford, old man," was her reply, words that fell in blood on parchment from her salacious mouth, "Way more than you can afford." A flashing, barbed tail caught the old pervert squarely on the cheek and in a Cloud of Cold Departure he was left alone again.
The tittering sorcerer fondled the unlaughing demoness, fingertips tingling in her black electric aura, enchanted by her sparking breasts. "How much, how much!" he cried. "More than you can afford, old man," was her reply, words that fell in blood on parchment from her salacious mouth, "Way more than you can afford." A flashing, barbed tail caught the old pervert squarely on the cheek and in a Cloud of Cold Departure he was left alone again.
This Is Front Page News!
The Replacements - Stink (1982)
"And a good time was had by all."
- Any local paper in any small town, anywhere in the United States of America, c. 1890-2007 (approx.)
"And a good time was had by all."
- Any local paper in any small town, anywhere in the United States of America, c. 1890-2007 (approx.)
March 17, 2007
Closer And Closer To Truth, Farther And Farther Away Each Day
The Flaming Lips - Hear It Is + The Flaming Lips (1987)
Hearing: The monkey spent hours and then days and then weeks, months, years, decades and centuries (or so it seemed) arranging and re-arranging the alloy objects, never satisfied with their 'Sound' - as he came to call it. Because he knew that these sharp, pointy things which constantly cut his hands and left his fingers bloodied and scarred, if put together properly, would make: Just. The. Right. Sound.
Hearing: The monkey spent hours and then days and then weeks, months, years, decades and centuries (or so it seemed) arranging and re-arranging the alloy objects, never satisfied with their 'Sound' - as he came to call it. Because he knew that these sharp, pointy things which constantly cut his hands and left his fingers bloodied and scarred, if put together properly, would make: Just. The. Right. Sound.
Stan Lee Should Have Had An Intervention Years Ago
What Takes A Telescope To See Sometimes
B.A.L.L. - Bird/Period (1988)
Possessing neither a sense of right, left or wrong, Timmy usually just spun dizzily in place for hours on end while assuming he was making his way from bedroom to bathroom, from work to home, abattoir to graveyard. His trail, a whirling galactic impression of blood smeared across a dozen states, was still somehow missed by the servants of a dozen law enforcement agencies.
Possessing neither a sense of right, left or wrong, Timmy usually just spun dizzily in place for hours on end while assuming he was making his way from bedroom to bathroom, from work to home, abattoir to graveyard. His trail, a whirling galactic impression of blood smeared across a dozen states, was still somehow missed by the servants of a dozen law enforcement agencies.
A Really Big Hole In Howard's Pocket
The Bevis Frond - Miasma - (1988)
"Assuming that I was sane and awake, my experience on that night was such as has befallen no man before. It was, moreover, a frightful confirmation of all I had sought to dismiss as myth and dream. Mercifull there is no proof, for in my fright I lost the awesome object which would - if real and brought out of that noxious abyss - have formed irrefutable evidence."
- H. P. Lovecraft, The Shadow Out of Time (1935)
"Assuming that I was sane and awake, my experience on that night was such as has befallen no man before. It was, moreover, a frightful confirmation of all I had sought to dismiss as myth and dream. Mercifull there is no proof, for in my fright I lost the awesome object which would - if real and brought out of that noxious abyss - have formed irrefutable evidence."
- H. P. Lovecraft, The Shadow Out of Time (1935)
Gray Strangers With Candy
Steve Tibbetts - Yr (1988)
Lithe fingers of ribbed plastic and nylon insinuated themselves into the crevices of Jeremy's cortex, molecule-thin invaders writhing through the puddle of his gray matter, tickling and pinching, twisting and tugging at dendrites and axons, neurons and nodes of ranvier. Jeremy smiled and peed his pants and spoke in tongues and remembered his mother in a yellow dress dancing with his father in his favorite dark suit but he couldn't remember his own name or why he had ever put the strange alien-colored toy up to his forehead in the first place.
Lithe fingers of ribbed plastic and nylon insinuated themselves into the crevices of Jeremy's cortex, molecule-thin invaders writhing through the puddle of his gray matter, tickling and pinching, twisting and tugging at dendrites and axons, neurons and nodes of ranvier. Jeremy smiled and peed his pants and spoke in tongues and remembered his mother in a yellow dress dancing with his father in his favorite dark suit but he couldn't remember his own name or why he had ever put the strange alien-colored toy up to his forehead in the first place.
March 12, 2007
Passing The Collection Plate For Pardoners
The Church - The Blurred Crusade (1982)
For centuries the Church had upheld the One True Faith (or OTF for short) against the ravages of science, reason, time, television and smarty-pants comedians. And had done so with a quiet dignity. But, much to his chagrin and eventual physical and financial losses, poor Morton Greensmith was to find out that even the Church has its limits. One just doesn't say THAT in Church.
For centuries the Church had upheld the One True Faith (or OTF for short) against the ravages of science, reason, time, television and smarty-pants comedians. And had done so with a quiet dignity. But, much to his chagrin and eventual physical and financial losses, poor Morton Greensmith was to find out that even the Church has its limits. One just doesn't say THAT in Church.
A Robot Lincoln Against Your Robot Marx Anyday!
Plasticland - Salon (1987)
Giant, mountain-tall robots strode across the empty planetoid's scarred and melted surface. Lasers shot from eyes as deep as oceans and nuclear-tipped missiles flew over and over again from abdomen-mounted racks, melting rock and steel. Overhead, in diamond satellites, scaly teenage hobbyists watched their toys at play, in love with the destruction and the power. Meanwhile, tiny mammals burrowed into cracks and evolved at a tremendous speed in the waves of cosmic radiation that now bathed the little world. Those lizards had better watch out.
Giant, mountain-tall robots strode across the empty planetoid's scarred and melted surface. Lasers shot from eyes as deep as oceans and nuclear-tipped missiles flew over and over again from abdomen-mounted racks, melting rock and steel. Overhead, in diamond satellites, scaly teenage hobbyists watched their toys at play, in love with the destruction and the power. Meanwhile, tiny mammals burrowed into cracks and evolved at a tremendous speed in the waves of cosmic radiation that now bathed the little world. Those lizards had better watch out.
Only What A Naked Man Can Accomplish Solo
The Silos - Cuba (1987)
Returning: The monkey - who felt like he'd been abandoned for an uncalled for length of time, though by who or whom or what he couldn't say, not really knowing anyone else, monkey or otherwise - suddenly realized he was walking and had been walking for a very long time through an alkali desert of startling beauty. Acidic butterflies of poisonous green and deadly black flew in great clouds between the petrified flowers of this new landscape. Angular shapes of a metallic bronze or silver hue were embedded in the salty crust of earth beneath his feet. They seemed to make patterns, to connect one with the other. He picked up a handful, finding them very flat, and began to lay them out one after the other: C G A D B E F. This is what they looked like and sounded like in the monkey's head. But what were they?
Returning: The monkey - who felt like he'd been abandoned for an uncalled for length of time, though by who or whom or what he couldn't say, not really knowing anyone else, monkey or otherwise - suddenly realized he was walking and had been walking for a very long time through an alkali desert of startling beauty. Acidic butterflies of poisonous green and deadly black flew in great clouds between the petrified flowers of this new landscape. Angular shapes of a metallic bronze or silver hue were embedded in the salty crust of earth beneath his feet. They seemed to make patterns, to connect one with the other. He picked up a handful, finding them very flat, and began to lay them out one after the other: C G A D B E F. This is what they looked like and sounded like in the monkey's head. But what were they?
On The Other Hand, Perhaps This Is What You Seek
Thin White Rope - Moonhead (1987)
It crawled from the desert, a shining beastmark, from some other worlds, one raging arc of the dream that rose up higher than the foothils and the low mountains and spread wings that encompassed a universe of belief and doubt, faith and fear. It had a name but that name could not be told, only guessed. Can you???
It crawled from the desert, a shining beastmark, from some other worlds, one raging arc of the dream that rose up higher than the foothils and the low mountains and spread wings that encompassed a universe of belief and doubt, faith and fear. It had a name but that name could not be told, only guessed. Can you???
This Is Not A Clue * This Is Not A Clue
The Mekons - The Mekons Rock 'n' Roll (1989)
Fifty-five stormtroopers, in paisley brownshirts, dancing the Watusi, cradling plushtoy origami sten guns, circled the statehouse bar-b-que dinner, traipsing off afterwards into the soft night over the edge of the hard wooden dock and down without murmur into the bottomless bay. Partygoers were nonplussed but pretended to ogle the President's new piercing, murmuring about how it caught the light of the bonfires so charmingly. So, so charming.
Fifty-five stormtroopers, in paisley brownshirts, dancing the Watusi, cradling plushtoy origami sten guns, circled the statehouse bar-b-que dinner, traipsing off afterwards into the soft night over the edge of the hard wooden dock and down without murmur into the bottomless bay. Partygoers were nonplussed but pretended to ogle the President's new piercing, murmuring about how it caught the light of the bonfires so charmingly. So, so charming.
That Ain't Reality! That's My Hot Dog Spoon
Snakefinger - A Collection of Songs, 1978-1980 (1988)
Kindly contributed by Mr. Zippy for your pleasure-center stimulation!
Kindly contributed by Mr. Zippy for your pleasure-center stimulation!
March 10, 2007
What Harm Hath Warner Wrought, What Harm!
Robyn Hitchcock - Invisible Hitchcock (1986)
It was nothing personal, the anvil falling on his head, nor the two-ton weight, nor the grand piano, nor the myriad of objects which might drop precipitously from the sky during a lifetime spent as a cartoon character. But knowing was not the same as feeling, a concept the coyote struggled with for years, never able to reconcile the two according to his therapist.
It was nothing personal, the anvil falling on his head, nor the two-ton weight, nor the grand piano, nor the myriad of objects which might drop precipitously from the sky during a lifetime spent as a cartoon character. But knowing was not the same as feeling, a concept the coyote struggled with for years, never able to reconcile the two according to his therapist.
Lipstick Traces On Emmett Kelly's Enormous Collar
Giant Sand - Long Stem Rant (1989)
"There are two types of lipsticks: undulating, long-wave lipstick which, when distilled, gives flags, and light lipstick whose flower produces kisses. These kisses can be obtained in two ways, either by drying the flower plucked at the moment it blooms, or by crushing its seed which gives a highly volatile essence that is difficult to preserve."
- Benjamin Peret, "The Four Elements" (1945)
"There are two types of lipsticks: undulating, long-wave lipstick which, when distilled, gives flags, and light lipstick whose flower produces kisses. These kisses can be obtained in two ways, either by drying the flower plucked at the moment it blooms, or by crushing its seed which gives a highly volatile essence that is difficult to preserve."
- Benjamin Peret, "The Four Elements" (1945)
A Massive Attack Precipitates Massive Denial
Swans - The Burning World (1989)
The dark-winged bombers flew low over the striated horizon, slipping from layer to layer in precise patterns, launching and launching and launching wave after wave of timed and otherwise gimmicked explosives, blossoming up through the night sky in patterns undecipherable since the death of the last of the magi. New magic entered the world while it slept.
The dark-winged bombers flew low over the striated horizon, slipping from layer to layer in precise patterns, launching and launching and launching wave after wave of timed and otherwise gimmicked explosives, blossoming up through the night sky in patterns undecipherable since the death of the last of the magi. New magic entered the world while it slept.
March 7, 2007
What Wizards Do While The Wires Play
The Residents - Live in Holland: The 13th Anniversary Show (1987)
The stars in the sky twinkled and melted and spun slowly down like chips of shattered glassine eyes, blinding thousands and tens of thousands as they looked up, only for them to weep a moment, blink, and with new vision see behind the walls of day and night and sleep and death they had built up in their blindness. A new world was begun.
The stars in the sky twinkled and melted and spun slowly down like chips of shattered glassine eyes, blinding thousands and tens of thousands as they looked up, only for them to weep a moment, blink, and with new vision see behind the walls of day and night and sleep and death they had built up in their blindness. A new world was begun.
The Biggest Surprise Party Ever
Blackbird - Blackbird (1987)
Strong men lifted the enormous stones up, piling one atop the other, millions of years ago on the now airless and lifeless planet, straining their backs and their hundreds of arms, calling out in synchrony as they heaved, hoots and whistles blowing through the then jungle air. They were happy to turn off the lights and hunker down to wait when the last stone toppled into place, sealing them forever in their tomb. Someday...shh...someday....
Strong men lifted the enormous stones up, piling one atop the other, millions of years ago on the now airless and lifeless planet, straining their backs and their hundreds of arms, calling out in synchrony as they heaved, hoots and whistles blowing through the then jungle air. They were happy to turn off the lights and hunker down to wait when the last stone toppled into place, sealing them forever in their tomb. Someday...shh...someday....
A Corn Dog And A Pink Lemonade It Is Not
Big Dipper - Heavens + Boo-Boo EP (1987)
Wild potato hair plant salad, sprig of parsley in arsenic, wilted leek and beef-paste torta and a Coke: $8.37 with tax.
Wild potato hair plant salad, sprig of parsley in arsenic, wilted leek and beef-paste torta and a Coke: $8.37 with tax.
March 5, 2007
What Happens On The Streets Of An Old European Town
Royal Crescent Mob - Omerta (1987)
"It is tasteless and rude, I say, this fashion today, for young men to traipse so gaily through the streets in little but the silks and furs of their morning gowns," doddered the swelling matriarch, miniscule opera glasses screwed to her near-blind eyes, "but, nonetheless, I do so enjoy it." She took another sip of her absinthe and cola and sighed delightedly.
"It is tasteless and rude, I say, this fashion today, for young men to traipse so gaily through the streets in little but the silks and furs of their morning gowns," doddered the swelling matriarch, miniscule opera glasses screwed to her near-blind eyes, "but, nonetheless, I do so enjoy it." She took another sip of her absinthe and cola and sighed delightedly.
Something Simple
Johnny Thunders - Hurt Me (1984)
I feel the absence of your dares
I am charmed by your world weary airs
With the skill of a hindoo snake charmer
The heart of a gold dalai lama
Still, I'd rather be all alone
Than to be here now
- JAW, Blood Routines (1992)
I feel the absence of your dares
I am charmed by your world weary airs
With the skill of a hindoo snake charmer
The heart of a gold dalai lama
Still, I'd rather be all alone
Than to be here now
- JAW, Blood Routines (1992)
The Atomic Pan Pipe Symphony Rides Again
F/i - Helioscopium (1997)
Tiny dancing robots swarmed the streets of the planet's largest metropol, shiny spinning wheels and flagellating limbs keening through the languid morning air, startling cats and dogs, little birds, commuters. Children were delighted. Schoolkids went wayward, following the winsome mechanicals, down the boulevards, through the parks, across bridges over rivers they children had never seen. Down to the spaceport they all ran, a blur of flesh and metal and chromed plastic, across the tarmac, up the ramps, inside the massive globular ship. Finally, one last limping child and one last pokey robot clambered up the ramp and the giant circular door swirled shut. Nuclear steam poured from the ship's corroded vents and it slowly ascended into the dark blue sky.
Tiny dancing robots swarmed the streets of the planet's largest metropol, shiny spinning wheels and flagellating limbs keening through the languid morning air, startling cats and dogs, little birds, commuters. Children were delighted. Schoolkids went wayward, following the winsome mechanicals, down the boulevards, through the parks, across bridges over rivers they children had never seen. Down to the spaceport they all ran, a blur of flesh and metal and chromed plastic, across the tarmac, up the ramps, inside the massive globular ship. Finally, one last limping child and one last pokey robot clambered up the ramp and the giant circular door swirled shut. Nuclear steam poured from the ship's corroded vents and it slowly ascended into the dark blue sky.
March 2, 2007
While The Astronomers Slept, Redux...
Sun Ra - Strange Celestial Road (1987)
Meanwhile, back on the planet: Several thousand years had passed quickly and with a quiet prosperity for the former starmen. The hulks of their indestructible star-ships had become playgrounds or amusement parks, office buildings, zoos and the homes of the fabulously wealthy. By a resounding majority vote, their stupendous engines had been turned off forever hundreds of years earlier and were now useless, never to push through the fabric of space and time again. One would think that, just about now, something awful and ironic precipitating the use of these once powerful machines would befall these peaceful people...
Please note: The above is a 'textual only' repost; the original 'non-textual' post accompanying it having been removed. Enjoy this repeat for your reading pleasure!
Meanwhile, back on the planet: Several thousand years had passed quickly and with a quiet prosperity for the former starmen. The hulks of their indestructible star-ships had become playgrounds or amusement parks, office buildings, zoos and the homes of the fabulously wealthy. By a resounding majority vote, their stupendous engines had been turned off forever hundreds of years earlier and were now useless, never to push through the fabric of space and time again. One would think that, just about now, something awful and ironic precipitating the use of these once powerful machines would befall these peaceful people...
Please note: The above is a 'textual only' repost; the original 'non-textual' post accompanying it having been removed. Enjoy this repeat for your reading pleasure!
It Always Cries When It Is Caught In A Trap
Pain Teens - Destroy Me Lover (1993)
Mother Rabbit anxiously wiped her hands on her stained apron, waiting for her boys to return. It was getting dark. There, in the West, she saw movement! and shielding her eyes with one furry paw she squinted into the last rays of the dying sun. Yes - it was her boys, but...something was wrong. She counted only five, and they were walking slowly, huddled together, carrying something between them on their shoulders. With a sob, she fell to her knees and covered her face, weeping, crying like only a mother rabbit can cry.
Mother Rabbit anxiously wiped her hands on her stained apron, waiting for her boys to return. It was getting dark. There, in the West, she saw movement! and shielding her eyes with one furry paw she squinted into the last rays of the dying sun. Yes - it was her boys, but...something was wrong. She counted only five, and they were walking slowly, huddled together, carrying something between them on their shoulders. With a sob, she fell to her knees and covered her face, weeping, crying like only a mother rabbit can cry.
America's One-Stop Shopping & Induction Center!
Moe Tucker - Life in Exile After Abdication (1989)
It was a big sale day at Army*Mart, "Half-Off!" screamed the signs. Flags waved cheerily over the entrance. The line stretched for miles, around corners and over hills, seeming endless. The face of every customer was lit with anticipation, each knowing he or she would get a special deal today on something absolutely fabulous that would make life perfect and reveal the secret of happiness to them. Nobody noticed that the doors were "Enter" only. Nobody noticed the long, long trains of black cars pulling silently out from behind the store. Flags waved cheerily over the entrance.
It was a big sale day at Army*Mart, "Half-Off!" screamed the signs. Flags waved cheerily over the entrance. The line stretched for miles, around corners and over hills, seeming endless. The face of every customer was lit with anticipation, each knowing he or she would get a special deal today on something absolutely fabulous that would make life perfect and reveal the secret of happiness to them. Nobody noticed that the doors were "Enter" only. Nobody noticed the long, long trains of black cars pulling silently out from behind the store. Flags waved cheerily over the entrance.
February 28, 2007
Angels Cried Diamonds Upon Their Upturned Faces
Nikki Sudden & the French Revolution - Groove (1990)
It was just a tiny windup metal toy but when its key was turned and it was set upon a table, it played the most beautiful music ever heard, by man, woman, child, beast and hiding angel. It played and played and played, for hours and days and years, but eventually - one day - the key refused to turn. A special box was built to preserve the fabulous musical toy, in hopes that one day it might play again.
It was just a tiny windup metal toy but when its key was turned and it was set upon a table, it played the most beautiful music ever heard, by man, woman, child, beast and hiding angel. It played and played and played, for hours and days and years, but eventually - one day - the key refused to turn. A special box was built to preserve the fabulous musical toy, in hopes that one day it might play again.
Beach Blanket Bingo Off Uranus
Eugene Chadbourne with Camper Van Beethoven - Camper Van Chadbourne (1989)
"Surf's up!" came the cry, echoing over the radiophones. A hundred wild-eyed spacehipsters scrambled for their sleek, semi-living surfboards. It took a certain type to live in the rings of Saturn, amidst the vast radiation storms and electromagnetic pulses, risking certain early death from cancer, inherited genetic mutations and the ridicule of the entire System. But catching that one wave, the big one! - and riding it all around the gas giant they called home was a goal worth being crazy for.
"Surf's up!" came the cry, echoing over the radiophones. A hundred wild-eyed spacehipsters scrambled for their sleek, semi-living surfboards. It took a certain type to live in the rings of Saturn, amidst the vast radiation storms and electromagnetic pulses, risking certain early death from cancer, inherited genetic mutations and the ridicule of the entire System. But catching that one wave, the big one! - and riding it all around the gas giant they called home was a goal worth being crazy for.
Watching What Happens When Your Back Is Turned
Big Black - The Rich Man's Eight Track Tape (1987)
Ah, the drums, the drums! Constantly pounding day and night, the jungle pulsed with their fury and with the screams of fanged predators and winged beasts, all set against the tiny band of intrepid yet foolish explorers. None of them had much cared for this expedition, but the charisma and bravery of their leader had sucked them pell-mell into this situation. Now, watching the multi-legged, six-winged lizard thing carry his headless torso off towards the distant mountains, they began to deeply regret their decision.
Ah, the drums, the drums! Constantly pounding day and night, the jungle pulsed with their fury and with the screams of fanged predators and winged beasts, all set against the tiny band of intrepid yet foolish explorers. None of them had much cared for this expedition, but the charisma and bravery of their leader had sucked them pell-mell into this situation. Now, watching the multi-legged, six-winged lizard thing carry his headless torso off towards the distant mountains, they began to deeply regret their decision.
February 27, 2007
The Primitive Ways Of Our Benighted Forebears
Various Artists - The Wailing Ultimate ~ The Homestead Records Sampler (1987)
"Drive grasshoppers into cooking pit
Drive ground squirrels from holes
Smoke bees from hive
Chase bison and other game over cliff or into trap
Night fishing with torch"
- Norm Kidder, "Some Uses of Fire" (2001)
"Drive grasshoppers into cooking pit
Drive ground squirrels from holes
Smoke bees from hive
Chase bison and other game over cliff or into trap
Night fishing with torch"
- Norm Kidder, "Some Uses of Fire" (2001)
Proof Of The Existence Of God
Alex Chilton - A Man Called Destruction (1995)
Long ago man or woman invented beer by drinking the fermented waters of leftovers, of some burned grains in a clay bowl, soaked by rain and storm, wild yeasts alighting, comingling, breathing life into dead matter? Someone must have been very, very thirsty.
Long ago man or woman invented beer by drinking the fermented waters of leftovers, of some burned grains in a clay bowl, soaked by rain and storm, wild yeasts alighting, comingling, breathing life into dead matter? Someone must have been very, very thirsty.
A Universe Of Coincidence Is Not One I Want To Live In
Julian Cope - Planetary Sit-In (Every Girl Has Your Name) (1996)
Again and again and again the starmen punished the space vole's planet with storms of asteroids, churning the surface, rupturing the crust, releasing molten streams from the planetary core - avenging the long ago defeat of their ancestor's at the paws of the vole's. In their violent, obsessed joy, they never saw noticed the return of the vole armada, fresh from their own timely mission against the starmen's homeworld. Oh, those crafty voles!
Again and again and again the starmen punished the space vole's planet with storms of asteroids, churning the surface, rupturing the crust, releasing molten streams from the planetary core - avenging the long ago defeat of their ancestor's at the paws of the vole's. In their violent, obsessed joy, they never saw noticed the return of the vole armada, fresh from their own timely mission against the starmen's homeworld. Oh, those crafty voles!
It Was In A Perfumed Garden That Justice Came To Light
The Chills - Kaleidoscope World (1993)
No other human eye had ever beheld the lost jewels of Hammurabi's ancient crown, mounted in the eye sockets of the skull of an extinct species of giant ape, never worn except as a conductor between the laws of the universe and the world of man as Hammurabi imagined it, made it. These were the thoughts of little Jeremy K. as he held up in the bright sunlight the half-rotten cat's head disinterred from his mother's flower garden. It was, after all, a much preferable explanation to any that touched on the 'sudden and unexpected trip' that Mommy and Daddy said Whiskers had left upon last month. Why would a cat need to visit the Pope, anyway?
No other human eye had ever beheld the lost jewels of Hammurabi's ancient crown, mounted in the eye sockets of the skull of an extinct species of giant ape, never worn except as a conductor between the laws of the universe and the world of man as Hammurabi imagined it, made it. These were the thoughts of little Jeremy K. as he held up in the bright sunlight the half-rotten cat's head disinterred from his mother's flower garden. It was, after all, a much preferable explanation to any that touched on the 'sudden and unexpected trip' that Mommy and Daddy said Whiskers had left upon last month. Why would a cat need to visit the Pope, anyway?
February 26, 2007
The Best Of Intentions & The Worst Of Articulations
Robyn Hitchcock & the Egyptians - Gotta Let This Hen Out (1986)
Syllabicizing: The monkey took on the task of naming everything he saw in the world because he suddenly thought that everything should have a name. His vocal chords, poorly developed still but evolving rapidly, were at first sorely strained by the exercise. Many an object was named with but subtle variation upon the words "Ughhgh" and "Graaakt!" Someday, the monkey thought he might take the time to rename these unfortunates.
Syllabicizing: The monkey took on the task of naming everything he saw in the world because he suddenly thought that everything should have a name. His vocal chords, poorly developed still but evolving rapidly, were at first sorely strained by the exercise. Many an object was named with but subtle variation upon the words "Ughhgh" and "Graaakt!" Someday, the monkey thought he might take the time to rename these unfortunates.
When Children Dream And Scheme Upon Their Adult Selves
Steve Tibbetts - Safe Journey (1984)
Across the Himalayas and into the mysterious lands beyond went the intrepid explorer, scuba gear in tow, searching for the equally mysterious inland sea of Tibet he'd read about as a child in a book, never knowing the book was a joke, a hoax, a ruse, perpetrated upon him by a scheming sibling in full knowledge of his gullible nature. She would be so surprised when he returned someday, specimen boxes full of the exotic fish and plants and riches of this imaginary ocean.
Across the Himalayas and into the mysterious lands beyond went the intrepid explorer, scuba gear in tow, searching for the equally mysterious inland sea of Tibet he'd read about as a child in a book, never knowing the book was a joke, a hoax, a ruse, perpetrated upon him by a scheming sibling in full knowledge of his gullible nature. She would be so surprised when he returned someday, specimen boxes full of the exotic fish and plants and riches of this imaginary ocean.
A List Of Wrongs Corrected By Rights
Various Artists - Beyond the Wildwood ~ A Tribute to Syd Barrett (1987)
The tea was too strong and the cream had curdled and the biscuits were stale and the plate was chipped and the butter was runny while the knife was rusty and the spoons were bent but the sky was blue and the grass was green and the sun was yellow and the birds were singing and the cats were dancing and so it somehow balanced all out.
The tea was too strong and the cream had curdled and the biscuits were stale and the plate was chipped and the butter was runny while the knife was rusty and the spoons were bent but the sky was blue and the grass was green and the sun was yellow and the birds were singing and the cats were dancing and so it somehow balanced all out.
February 23, 2007
Would A Leopard Be Caught Dead Wearing A Human-Skin Hat?
Plasticland - Let's Play Pollyanna (1990)
Polka dots always look better in the mind's eye than in reality, thought Johnson, wishing he had not used an indelible marker. Or shaved his head. And back. It was going to be a long day.
Polka dots always look better in the mind's eye than in reality, thought Johnson, wishing he had not used an indelible marker. Or shaved his head. And back. It was going to be a long day.
Some Dare Call It Art!
Black Sun Ensemble - Black Sun Ensemble (1985, Reissued 2000)
Tadpoles by the thousands, by the millions, larger than a man's pinky finger, flowed and overflowed from the toilet bowl onto the tiled bathroom floor. Toilet water and potential frogs swirled with abandon out the door and down the hallway, spilling down the stairs in a living waterfall before exiting by the front door onto the lawn. Mary and Robert watched it all with quiet appreciation from the living room, perched on their prized vintage barstools, enjoying the light of the dying sun that played gently across the watery havoc. It had been a very successful experiment, they concluded, toasting each other silently.
Tadpoles by the thousands, by the millions, larger than a man's pinky finger, flowed and overflowed from the toilet bowl onto the tiled bathroom floor. Toilet water and potential frogs swirled with abandon out the door and down the hallway, spilling down the stairs in a living waterfall before exiting by the front door onto the lawn. Mary and Robert watched it all with quiet appreciation from the living room, perched on their prized vintage barstools, enjoying the light of the dying sun that played gently across the watery havoc. It had been a very successful experiment, they concluded, toasting each other silently.
February 22, 2007
Lotto Winner Tells All - Death Conquered!
The Catheads - Hubba (1987)
"Rubbing the Buddha's belly, an elephant's trunk, Lincoln's nose, your neighbor's bald spot, a cat's behind and your Holy Bible - simultaneously - is the only assured way to win the lottery," says Mrs. Norbert Norbert Norbert, nine-times winner of the Irish Sweepstakes, the Illinois Lotto, the Missouri State Fair Five Legged-Race and a guaranteed 'Ticket to Heaven' granted to her by the Rev. Sun Myung Moon. Now deceased, Mrs. Norbert-cubed spoke from the Great Beyond on condition of anonymity.
"Rubbing the Buddha's belly, an elephant's trunk, Lincoln's nose, your neighbor's bald spot, a cat's behind and your Holy Bible - simultaneously - is the only assured way to win the lottery," says Mrs. Norbert Norbert Norbert, nine-times winner of the Irish Sweepstakes, the Illinois Lotto, the Missouri State Fair Five Legged-Race and a guaranteed 'Ticket to Heaven' granted to her by the Rev. Sun Myung Moon. Now deceased, Mrs. Norbert-cubed spoke from the Great Beyond on condition of anonymity.
A Strong Key Return Pops The Planet Over The Net
Damon & Naomi - The Wondrous World of Damon & Naomi (1995)
Geraldine didn't think she would ever recover from the last night's party. Glasses, bottles, puddles, clothing, antlers - everywhere!
Geraldine didn't think she would ever recover from the last night's party. Glasses, bottles, puddles, clothing, antlers - everywhere!
February 21, 2007
One Man's Breakfast Is Another Man's Funeral
Bongwater - Double Bummer + Breaking No New Ground (1989)
Strong currents nibbled at the giant's toes as he swam the inland ocean, more a large lake from his perspective, crossing from his gargantuan castle home that rose straight from the sea on a thousand pillars of eroded limestone. He hoped to reach land within the half-hour, curious to know how the world had changed during his several millenia-long nap. Sniffing at the air, he could just taste the scent of those tiny two-legged appetizers he liked so much. At least they were still around, he thought to himself. And it was almost time for brunch...
Strong currents nibbled at the giant's toes as he swam the inland ocean, more a large lake from his perspective, crossing from his gargantuan castle home that rose straight from the sea on a thousand pillars of eroded limestone. He hoped to reach land within the half-hour, curious to know how the world had changed during his several millenia-long nap. Sniffing at the air, he could just taste the scent of those tiny two-legged appetizers he liked so much. At least they were still around, he thought to himself. And it was almost time for brunch...
February 20, 2007
Drinking Beer From Acorn Cups All Day Long - Huzzah!
Bardo Pond - Dose: The Singles (1994-96)
The blue-eyed cat peered curiously from out of the vivid yellow rose bush, white fur sleek in the hot sun. It was fat and content and well-fed and chose to ignore the taunting of the squirrels, who had organized a polka-masquerade in the far corner of the garden. The squirrels were spiteful creatures, the cat knew; they hated polka.
The blue-eyed cat peered curiously from out of the vivid yellow rose bush, white fur sleek in the hot sun. It was fat and content and well-fed and chose to ignore the taunting of the squirrels, who had organized a polka-masquerade in the far corner of the garden. The squirrels were spiteful creatures, the cat knew; they hated polka.
One Eye Closing And Three More Opening
Tar Babies - Death Trip (1992)
Jumping: Slowly, very slowly, as he watched, the sheets of color and distortions began to reassemble themselves into forms the monkey more easily recognized. But with a difference. Each plant, each insect or animal, each object (a new concept he found wonderfully intriguing - differentiation, ascribing unique 'objectness' to all things!) seemed pregnant with wonder, waiting for him. What they awaited he did not know. But he rose to his calloused feet and walked out into the new world.
Jumping: Slowly, very slowly, as he watched, the sheets of color and distortions began to reassemble themselves into forms the monkey more easily recognized. But with a difference. Each plant, each insect or animal, each object (a new concept he found wonderfully intriguing - differentiation, ascribing unique 'objectness' to all things!) seemed pregnant with wonder, waiting for him. What they awaited he did not know. But he rose to his calloused feet and walked out into the new world.
Possessed By Numerous Possessions At A Psychic Yard Sale
Divine Horsemen - Snake Handler (1987)
The tunnel narrowed around Geoffrey as he pushed his lanky form forward, arms thrust out in front of him to grab at any available handhold. Dust and tiny clouds of silky fur blew past him or caught on his face, in his mouth. Somewhere up ahead there was a source of fresh air, if only he could reach it. His knees bled through the shredded khaki of his trousers and he deeply regretted taking up the white rabbit's invitation.
The tunnel narrowed around Geoffrey as he pushed his lanky form forward, arms thrust out in front of him to grab at any available handhold. Dust and tiny clouds of silky fur blew past him or caught on his face, in his mouth. Somewhere up ahead there was a source of fresh air, if only he could reach it. His knees bled through the shredded khaki of his trousers and he deeply regretted taking up the white rabbit's invitation.
February 19, 2007
Support Your Local Public Library, Cowboys!
Scraping Foetus Off the Wheel - Nail (1985)
Random words fell through the tinfoil sieve that covered the library, enriching the pale and worthless volumes, encouraging growth and deep, moist discovery. The librarians, some appalled and some overjoyed, ran in circles, scattering pages and covers as they set up wooden buckets to catch the old and useless words that dripped from the shelves.
Random words fell through the tinfoil sieve that covered the library, enriching the pale and worthless volumes, encouraging growth and deep, moist discovery. The librarians, some appalled and some overjoyed, ran in circles, scattering pages and covers as they set up wooden buckets to catch the old and useless words that dripped from the shelves.
Building Cities of Dirt And Clods To Revel In
Spacemen 3 - Performance (1988)
Reggie was exhausted. Pulling a plow of stone was hard work, sunup to sundown. His back ached, his thighs trembled, the enormous muscles of his neck chafed under the hard wood and leather yoke. But it was a good kind of tired, he concluded, looking back over the acres of field he had furrowed this day, his dark eyes unblinking as the earth slowly healed itself and all traces of his labor disappeared. Yes, Reggie thought, today was good but tomorrow would be even better.
Reggie was exhausted. Pulling a plow of stone was hard work, sunup to sundown. His back ached, his thighs trembled, the enormous muscles of his neck chafed under the hard wood and leather yoke. But it was a good kind of tired, he concluded, looking back over the acres of field he had furrowed this day, his dark eyes unblinking as the earth slowly healed itself and all traces of his labor disappeared. Yes, Reggie thought, today was good but tomorrow would be even better.
Look Where We Worship
Crystalized Movements - This Wideness Comes (1990)
"There was no notion on the part of the five young interspatial transbeings that they were being followed. After all, they barely knew where and when and how they were themselves. But soon they became four and then three and then two and it was finally obvious. (They were not very intelligent beings, actually, their frightening multi-limbed phantom appearances making them seem more awesome than they really were.) The final two looked each other in their multifaceted eyes and asked the burning question: "Who?" No answer forthcoming, they linked tentacles and fangs together, back to back to back, and settled down into an ever shrinking ball of fright to wait. Thus was the world begun."
- Arthur Machen (Ed.), Welsh (& Other) Creation Myths (1917).
"There was no notion on the part of the five young interspatial transbeings that they were being followed. After all, they barely knew where and when and how they were themselves. But soon they became four and then three and then two and it was finally obvious. (They were not very intelligent beings, actually, their frightening multi-limbed phantom appearances making them seem more awesome than they really were.) The final two looked each other in their multifaceted eyes and asked the burning question: "Who?" No answer forthcoming, they linked tentacles and fangs together, back to back to back, and settled down into an ever shrinking ball of fright to wait. Thus was the world begun."
- Arthur Machen (Ed.), Welsh (& Other) Creation Myths (1917).
February 16, 2007
Insectile Chatter Equals Mammalian Love Song
Eugene Chadbourne - Eddie Chatterbox Double Trio Love Album (1988)
Glistening: A strange thing began to happen in the monkey's head. Several supposedly distinct and unrelated things, things normally outside his ability to synthesize, merged together and became a new thing. The dent in his head; the itch; the music. They were all related...connected...one thing. All the world seemed to rush straight upwards in blurring lines of color suddenly, blocks of green that were grass shooting skywards to bisect a sheet of solid blue while pebbles became two-dimensional mountains and a lone bee a striated godthing of yellow and black vibrating through it all, moving before and behind the grass and the rocks and the sky. This, the monkey thought - for now he could think - is very interesting.
Glistening: A strange thing began to happen in the monkey's head. Several supposedly distinct and unrelated things, things normally outside his ability to synthesize, merged together and became a new thing. The dent in his head; the itch; the music. They were all related...connected...one thing. All the world seemed to rush straight upwards in blurring lines of color suddenly, blocks of green that were grass shooting skywards to bisect a sheet of solid blue while pebbles became two-dimensional mountains and a lone bee a striated godthing of yellow and black vibrating through it all, moving before and behind the grass and the rocks and the sky. This, the monkey thought - for now he could think - is very interesting.
The Things John Wayne Did That Never Made The Papers
Giant Sand - Giant Sandwich (1989)
The Sheriff looked sideways at the carnage on the barroom floor, never one to stomach grue as well as his True-Western compatriots. He wondered often if this made him less of a man, less of a dude. He tipped back his vermillion ten-gallon and punched his shoulders up, ready to work. Somebody had to put the heads back with their right bodies, after all. So it could start all over again.
The Sheriff looked sideways at the carnage on the barroom floor, never one to stomach grue as well as his True-Western compatriots. He wondered often if this made him less of a man, less of a dude. He tipped back his vermillion ten-gallon and punched his shoulders up, ready to work. Somebody had to put the heads back with their right bodies, after all. So it could start all over again.
No Reason To Live, No Reason Not To
Lawndale - Sasquatch Rock (1987)
Another Steve Austin morning, macrolens eyeball retrofit testrange, biopump bloodheart circuit blowup, fingernail atombomb carheist kitten, toejam raga hippo blast: ALL SYSTEMS GO!
Another Steve Austin morning, macrolens eyeball retrofit testrange, biopump bloodheart circuit blowup, fingernail atombomb carheist kitten, toejam raga hippo blast: ALL SYSTEMS GO!
February 15, 2007
Knowing How To Read A Map Doesn't Mean You Are Not Lost
My Dad Is Dead - Let's Skip the Details (1988)
Watson knew there was nothing wrong with the Doctor, but he followed his orders to the letter. A left turn at the gazebo, two full circles around the peeing statue of Pan, five strong hops toward the reflecting pool and a final somersault that shattered the peaceful waters and left Watson staring dazedly up at the cloudless sky. The water was only an inch deep over a mirrored surface, Watson now realized. Then, faintly, he heard the unmistakeable sound of laughter.
Watson knew there was nothing wrong with the Doctor, but he followed his orders to the letter. A left turn at the gazebo, two full circles around the peeing statue of Pan, five strong hops toward the reflecting pool and a final somersault that shattered the peaceful waters and left Watson staring dazedly up at the cloudless sky. The water was only an inch deep over a mirrored surface, Watson now realized. Then, faintly, he heard the unmistakeable sound of laughter.
Never Enough To Stop The Gears
Glass Eye - Hello Young Lovers (1989)
The pushers and the dealers and the buyers and the robbers and the enforcers of the laws all danced together in a swirling madness, knowing they had conned the people mightily and ensured their padded pockets for many years to come. The conned and depleted watched from the ballroom's edges, but their eyes were upon a small child standing straight with one hand upon a large lever. It pulled the lever sharply back. As the ballroom floor disappeared, the grinders came to life.
The pushers and the dealers and the buyers and the robbers and the enforcers of the laws all danced together in a swirling madness, knowing they had conned the people mightily and ensured their padded pockets for many years to come. The conned and depleted watched from the ballroom's edges, but their eyes were upon a small child standing straight with one hand upon a large lever. It pulled the lever sharply back. As the ballroom floor disappeared, the grinders came to life.
Beggaring Description, All Eyes Upward Turn
F/i - Space Mission (Rarities Compilation) (2000)
Upon the promised planet, pods opening with engineered life emerging - long slow trains of hoofed and tentacled life - the philosphers and dreamers of the spacemen surveyed their accomplishment. There would be a good place for a temple, before the grove by the river. There, upon the outcropping of what might be granite, a memorial for all those lost in space along the way. There, and there, and there - coffee shops.
Upon the promised planet, pods opening with engineered life emerging - long slow trains of hoofed and tentacled life - the philosphers and dreamers of the spacemen surveyed their accomplishment. There would be a good place for a temple, before the grove by the river. There, upon the outcropping of what might be granite, a memorial for all those lost in space along the way. There, and there, and there - coffee shops.
February 14, 2007
Saint Valentine's Day Massacre Playoffs
H. P. Zinker - The Sunshine CD (1991)
Nothing but and nothing for and nothing forward but nothing for other nothingward.
Nothing but and nothing for and nothing forward but nothing for other nothingward.
Why Does My Pudding Never Tell A Lie?
Brian Ritchie - The Blend (1987)
"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words."
- Philip K. Dick, How To Build A Universe That Doesn't Fall Apart Two Days Later (1978)
"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words."
- Philip K. Dick, How To Build A Universe That Doesn't Fall Apart Two Days Later (1978)
Another Bad Day Inside Another Man's Head
Telstar Ponies - Voices From the New Music (1996)
The wind peeled back Chester's flesh, raising it like a cloud around his shaking form before lifting it into the dark sky, rising and fluttering away, nothing but a damp man-shaped fleshkite. In the few seconds he had left to live, as blood fountained from a hundred places in his exposed self, Chester strongly wished he'd thought his plan through more carefully.
The wind peeled back Chester's flesh, raising it like a cloud around his shaking form before lifting it into the dark sky, rising and fluttering away, nothing but a damp man-shaped fleshkite. In the few seconds he had left to live, as blood fountained from a hundred places in his exposed self, Chester strongly wished he'd thought his plan through more carefully.
Strong Magic Coffee Beans Burn Brightly
Black Sun Ensemble - Lambent Flame (1988)
The crystalline blue elixir drizzled slowly onto the searingly hot black iron mirror, winding clouds of multicolored steam shooting up like gem-encrusted arms towards the necromancer's lean, scarred face. The portents boded ill, regardless of the medium, the method, he thought. He sighed and turned away from another failed experiment. Oh well, maybe Bewitched is on, he thought, smiling at image of the enticing Samantha avatar in his mind.
The crystalline blue elixir drizzled slowly onto the searingly hot black iron mirror, winding clouds of multicolored steam shooting up like gem-encrusted arms towards the necromancer's lean, scarred face. The portents boded ill, regardless of the medium, the method, he thought. He sighed and turned away from another failed experiment. Oh well, maybe Bewitched is on, he thought, smiling at image of the enticing Samantha avatar in his mind.
February 12, 2007
Silver Strings Kill Witches In The Mountians
John Fahey - I Remember Blind Joe Death (1987)
Rotating: The sound that was like music increased as the monkey scratched and scratched at the itch in the dent left by the dreamweapon. The monkey stopped scratching the itch, but did not lower his paws from his head, so that he could turn himself around and around and around to place the origin of the music. His raised elbows were like hairy antennae. But the music faded. Slowly, the monkey began to hit that itch again. And the music began, again.
Rotating: The sound that was like music increased as the monkey scratched and scratched at the itch in the dent left by the dreamweapon. The monkey stopped scratching the itch, but did not lower his paws from his head, so that he could turn himself around and around and around to place the origin of the music. His raised elbows were like hairy antennae. But the music faded. Slowly, the monkey began to hit that itch again. And the music began, again.
Behind The Screen, We Crouched, Laughing, Yes
Negativland - Escape From Noise (1987)
We could hear the sound of clapping, or what sounded like clapping, like flesh hitting flesh hard and popping the air with its hot force
We could hear the sound of metal wings, or what sounded like metal wings, like feathers of tin and copper and impermanent steel moving the air aside with a heavy fall
We could hear the sound of laughter, or what sounded like laughter, like parents and teachers and their open mouths, hawing at the endless air with empty joy
We could hear the sound of clapping, or what sounded like clapping, like flesh hitting flesh hard and popping the air with its hot force
We could hear the sound of metal wings, or what sounded like metal wings, like feathers of tin and copper and impermanent steel moving the air aside with a heavy fall
We could hear the sound of laughter, or what sounded like laughter, like parents and teachers and their open mouths, hawing at the endless air with empty joy
February 10, 2007
A Vast Array Of Saucers, Flying, Static, Otherwise, Melting
Happy Flowers - Too Many Bunnies (Not Enough Mittens) (1989)
The three Lester children were never normal. Not by any stretch of the imagination. Their mother knew this either before they were born or immediately after, when the doctor informed her that - somehow - the umbilical cord had already been cut...months earlier. Dinnertime was never a happy time in the Lester home.
The three Lester children were never normal. Not by any stretch of the imagination. Their mother knew this either before they were born or immediately after, when the doctor informed her that - somehow - the umbilical cord had already been cut...months earlier. Dinnertime was never a happy time in the Lester home.
Dandelion Wine, Watermelon Whisky, A Dead Hippie And Thou
Tiny Lights - Prayer for the Halcyon Fear (1985)
Between strong draughts of liquid lead laced with dictionary factory residue, the huddled group of spaceclowns considered their bleak future: Join the Resistance Circus and fight the Papercut Plutocracy or...What?
Between strong draughts of liquid lead laced with dictionary factory residue, the huddled group of spaceclowns considered their bleak future: Join the Resistance Circus and fight the Papercut Plutocracy or...What?
Moving Fast & Targeting!
Queen Elizabeth (Julian Cope) - Queen Elizabeth (1994)
Nothing short of total war could save the tiny beleaguered nation of Bulbouspumphandle and only Grand Sub-Space Commander Larry could bring down such total war. Gently stroking the fur of his traditional panda-skull war helmet, the Larry pondered the depths of his own depravity, his own mercilessness, and knew that it was good. He turned to his miniscule batman, gave him a certain wink, and uttered the final, fatal order.
Nothing short of total war could save the tiny beleaguered nation of Bulbouspumphandle and only Grand Sub-Space Commander Larry could bring down such total war. Gently stroking the fur of his traditional panda-skull war helmet, the Larry pondered the depths of his own depravity, his own mercilessness, and knew that it was good. He turned to his miniscule batman, gave him a certain wink, and uttered the final, fatal order.
February 7, 2007
Mammals Wonder About Non-Mammals, But Is It Reciprocal?
Plasticland - Wonder Wonderful Wonderland (1985)
Worshipful, the starmen gazed down upon the new planet, red and green and yellow and brown - as their eyes saw such things - eyes teary upon seeing the peculiar alignment of mountains and rivers and inland oceans they had been told to look for. The planet smiled up at them, small tears in the corners of its eyes, blessing them, welcoming them home. Retrojets began to flare. Descent was prepared for.
Worshipful, the starmen gazed down upon the new planet, red and green and yellow and brown - as their eyes saw such things - eyes teary upon seeing the peculiar alignment of mountains and rivers and inland oceans they had been told to look for. The planet smiled up at them, small tears in the corners of its eyes, blessing them, welcoming them home. Retrojets began to flare. Descent was prepared for.
An Epic Moment In The Monkey's Day At Night
Kendra Smith - The Guild of Temporal Adventurers (1992)
Watching the Skies: Fingers seeming clumsy and ineffectual, the monkey looked wildly around for something, something that he couldn't name, not even knowing how to name a thing. But his eyes focused, grew keen, and he saw a small flake of rock with a shiny edge. He took it up with his fingers and rolled it around, back and forth, hand to hand. Somehow, he knew what to do with this...tool. As he gingerly but purposefully lifted it upwards towards his scalp and the dreamweapon's dent, music began to play.
Watching the Skies: Fingers seeming clumsy and ineffectual, the monkey looked wildly around for something, something that he couldn't name, not even knowing how to name a thing. But his eyes focused, grew keen, and he saw a small flake of rock with a shiny edge. He took it up with his fingers and rolled it around, back and forth, hand to hand. Somehow, he knew what to do with this...tool. As he gingerly but purposefully lifted it upwards towards his scalp and the dreamweapon's dent, music began to play.
February 6, 2007
Five Lanes Clear, No Waiting
Black Sun Ensemble - Tragic Magic (1991)
Willard was a strong man who despised weakness in others. He never went out of his way to push down the weak and miserable and poor and grieving and stupid in life, but if they came across his path he suffered no mercy upon them. Many people were left shattered and weeping in his wake. Then, one day, from a clear blue sky, Willard was struck by a realization, one about the size and shape and weight of a bowling ball. Upon his head.
Willard was a strong man who despised weakness in others. He never went out of his way to push down the weak and miserable and poor and grieving and stupid in life, but if they came across his path he suffered no mercy upon them. Many people were left shattered and weeping in his wake. Then, one day, from a clear blue sky, Willard was struck by a realization, one about the size and shape and weight of a bowling ball. Upon his head.
The Slaves Of The Sun
Tar Babies - Honey Bubble (1989)
"What is Time...That you speak of it so subserviently? Are we to be the slaves of the sun, that second-hand, overrated knob of gilt, or of his sister, that fatuous circle of silver paper? A curse upon their ridiculous dictatorship!"
- Mervyn Peake, Titus Groan (1946)
"What is Time...That you speak of it so subserviently? Are we to be the slaves of the sun, that second-hand, overrated knob of gilt, or of his sister, that fatuous circle of silver paper? A curse upon their ridiculous dictatorship!"
- Mervyn Peake, Titus Groan (1946)
Misery And Company Are Amicable If Not Best Friends
True West - Drifters (1985)
Dusty long-legged strippers with breasts of steel and iodized salt strode the old town's brick-covered streets, frightening bold men and scaring little boys to death. On the bright side, a generation of little girls saw their future flaming before them and knew that it would be very good. They ran after their new friends, jumping over the dead and singing in loud high voices.
Dusty long-legged strippers with breasts of steel and iodized salt strode the old town's brick-covered streets, frightening bold men and scaring little boys to death. On the bright side, a generation of little girls saw their future flaming before them and knew that it would be very good. They ran after their new friends, jumping over the dead and singing in loud high voices.
February 5, 2007
Three Hardy Pancake Men Attack Dog In Window
Wake Ooloo - Hear No Evil (1994)
Wake Ooloo - What About It (1995)
Wake Ooloo - Stop the Ride (1996)
Wild with passion, the fifteen chimp-strong marching band whipped through their medley of Copland/Ives/Partch "Party Classics" while the angry devolutionist's screams of "Bokanovskify us! Bokanovskify us!" sounded like weak tea insults from behind the barbed-wire gate.
Wake Ooloo - What About It (1995)
Wake Ooloo - Stop the Ride (1996)
Wild with passion, the fifteen chimp-strong marching band whipped through their medley of Copland/Ives/Partch "Party Classics" while the angry devolutionist's screams of "Bokanovskify us! Bokanovskify us!" sounded like weak tea insults from behind the barbed-wire gate.
The Love Of Water, Of Living By Water, Of Living In Water
Richard Barone - Cool Blue Halo (1987)
Aspiring: Pensive after his salty breakfast, the monkey sat in a field of yellow flowers the size of rhinos, whose golden saffron heads nodded in the gentle breeze thirty or forty feet above his still-dented head. He scratched at the hollow in his cranium where the dreamweapon had hit and entered. It felt soft and he began to prod harder and harder, using both calloused hands. Sweat beaded on his hairy brow, his lips gnurled back from his yellow teeth, his huge nostrils flared cavernous! What an itch!!!
Aspiring: Pensive after his salty breakfast, the monkey sat in a field of yellow flowers the size of rhinos, whose golden saffron heads nodded in the gentle breeze thirty or forty feet above his still-dented head. He scratched at the hollow in his cranium where the dreamweapon had hit and entered. It felt soft and he began to prod harder and harder, using both calloused hands. Sweat beaded on his hairy brow, his lips gnurled back from his yellow teeth, his huge nostrils flared cavernous! What an itch!!!
Imperfect, Imbecilic, Incompetent, Idyllic
Paul Roland - Happy Families (1988)
Bucking against the current, the intrepid white explorer trudged upstream, dead crystal crocodiles colliding every mis-step of the way, but he knew - knew! - that the lost sugar city of the ant people lay just beyond the next bend. In the pouring hot tropical rain, it was the only crutch he had.
Bucking against the current, the intrepid white explorer trudged upstream, dead crystal crocodiles colliding every mis-step of the way, but he knew - knew! - that the lost sugar city of the ant people lay just beyond the next bend. In the pouring hot tropical rain, it was the only crutch he had.
February 4, 2007
Barnacles At Bedtime; Or, How The Navy Became More "Friendly"
Willow O' The Wisps Waver Wanly O'er The Wapsipinicon
Robyn Hitchcock - A Globe of Frogs (CD3 Single) (1988)
No sane man or woman would have refused a direct mind-order from the Head of Space Control Zeta, but Reginald Harbottom was no ordinary man or woman. Or man or woman at all!
No sane man or woman would have refused a direct mind-order from the Head of Space Control Zeta, but Reginald Harbottom was no ordinary man or woman. Or man or woman at all!
February 3, 2007
A Strong Wind Rattled The Hat Factory Windows - Gee!
Graeme Jefferies - Messages For the Cakekitchen (1987)
Wallowing on: Breakfast was served to the monkey by a little girl wrapped in silver and black leaves, or what the monkey assumed were leaves, having little experience with fashion. "The tea is very good with cream and the fish have acheived just the right melting consistency," said the little girl with barely a lisp. The monkey was impressed.
Wallowing on: Breakfast was served to the monkey by a little girl wrapped in silver and black leaves, or what the monkey assumed were leaves, having little experience with fashion. "The tea is very good with cream and the fish have acheived just the right melting consistency," said the little girl with barely a lisp. The monkey was impressed.
I Sometimes Seemed To Have Lived For 70 Or 100 Years In One Night
Opal - Happy Nightmare Baby (1987)
"The sense of space, and in the end, the sense of time, were both powerfully affected. Buildings, landscapes &c. were exhibited in proportions so vast as the bodily eye is not fitted to receive. Space swelled, and was amplified to an extent of unutterable infinity. This, however, did not disturb me so much as the vast expansion of time..."
- Thomas de Quincey, Confessions of an English Opium Eater (1821).
"The sense of space, and in the end, the sense of time, were both powerfully affected. Buildings, landscapes &c. were exhibited in proportions so vast as the bodily eye is not fitted to receive. Space swelled, and was amplified to an extent of unutterable infinity. This, however, did not disturb me so much as the vast expansion of time..."
- Thomas de Quincey, Confessions of an English Opium Eater (1821).
Punishing The Weak For Over Forty Years!
Loop - Heaven's End (1987) (LP)
Reading conspiracy novels led Monroe to investigate the history of real conspiracies, though being conspiratorial in nature, clandestine in fact, no actual information existed on such. Monroe, tired of peeing into the face of reality, began to write elaborate conspiracy novels about the lack of verifiable information regarding true conspiracies. These became very popular and led many otherwise sensible young men to their deaths.
Reading conspiracy novels led Monroe to investigate the history of real conspiracies, though being conspiratorial in nature, clandestine in fact, no actual information existed on such. Monroe, tired of peeing into the face of reality, began to write elaborate conspiracy novels about the lack of verifiable information regarding true conspiracies. These became very popular and led many otherwise sensible young men to their deaths.
January 31, 2007
Halloween Is Different Things To Different Folks
Au Pairs - Playing With a Different Sex (1981)
"You were always the passionate one," he said to this lovely lady monobrow, stroking fangs and fur and tail together. "And I don't care if your husband is the circus strongman, I don't care. I'm just glad that you came." Over the crest of the bigtop, the full moon rose slowly into view.
"You were always the passionate one," he said to this lovely lady monobrow, stroking fangs and fur and tail together. "And I don't care if your husband is the circus strongman, I don't care. I'm just glad that you came." Over the crest of the bigtop, the full moon rose slowly into view.
Sometimes One Must, Even If One Musn't, Hmmm?
Hüsker Dü - Eight Miles High (CD3 Single) (1984)
Hüsker Dü - Makes No Sense At All (CD3 Single) (1985)
Oh, the rapid and the revolving, the hardly and the softly, pumpkin matter greyswirl doggie-style high. It's an aphid dance for sure, Pa, down at the spaceport tonight. For sure.
Hüsker Dü - Makes No Sense At All (CD3 Single) (1985)
Oh, the rapid and the revolving, the hardly and the softly, pumpkin matter greyswirl doggie-style high. It's an aphid dance for sure, Pa, down at the spaceport tonight. For sure.
Aldous Huxley Commandeered The Little Dinghy
Yung Wu - Shore Leave (1987) (LP)
Alan Watts threw a party for The Beatles but forgot to invite them, so imagine his surprise when they actually arrived, in spangles and fur, all six of them, antennae all a-quiver: Jok, Splotz, Notch, Huk, Tlik and Ringo. A good time was had by all. (Tlik likes spinach dip.)
Alan Watts threw a party for The Beatles but forgot to invite them, so imagine his surprise when they actually arrived, in spangles and fur, all six of them, antennae all a-quiver: Jok, Splotz, Notch, Huk, Tlik and Ringo. A good time was had by all. (Tlik likes spinach dip.)
January 30, 2007
The Walls Of Jericho Fall Again, Sideways
The Fall - Palace of Swords Reversed (1987)
Four or five or six varicolored men-like things reared up from the bathroom floor and convinced themselves of their reality by puncturing, in turn, each their neighbor's left eyeball. This done, feeling better about themselves, they made strong coffee and considered the problem of the saxophone. How to avoid it, how to avoid it?
Four or five or six varicolored men-like things reared up from the bathroom floor and convinced themselves of their reality by puncturing, in turn, each their neighbor's left eyeball. This done, feeling better about themselves, they made strong coffee and considered the problem of the saxophone. How to avoid it, how to avoid it?
The Beginning Of Dreams For Our Monkey Friend
Magic Hour - No Excess Is Absurd (1994)
Addendum: While the monkey enjoyed the dance, he soon tired and crept off - as monkies are wont to creep like - to find sleep in the darker, safer branches of a large tree growing from the center of the ballroom aboard the airship. Here, the silver and orange leaves gently shimmered with a music of escort and reprieve. He soon slept.
Addendum: While the monkey enjoyed the dance, he soon tired and crept off - as monkies are wont to creep like - to find sleep in the darker, safer branches of a large tree growing from the center of the ballroom aboard the airship. Here, the silver and orange leaves gently shimmered with a music of escort and reprieve. He soon slept.
A Craved Blue Memorandum, Delivered By The High School Nurse
Plasticland - Dapper Snappings (1994)
Nothing could have prepared the snapping turtle for what it found in the oversized pink box that was henceforth to be its new and happy home, until it read the corporate memo.
Nothing could have prepared the snapping turtle for what it found in the oversized pink box that was henceforth to be its new and happy home, until it read the corporate memo.
January 29, 2007
What We Did While They Were Sleeping
Julian Cope - Droolian (1990)
Once the spacemen and their spacemencats and spacemendogs were soundly sleeping by the quiet riverside, we launched our long-planned and vicious attack!
Once the spacemen and their spacemencats and spacemendogs were soundly sleeping by the quiet riverside, we launched our long-planned and vicious attack!
They Emerge From The Hyper-Cocoon
Nice Strong Arm - Stress City (1989)
Their guitars flaming, the star sailors laid waste to the lunar doormice colony, mistaking it for another thing, a thing they feared. Afterwards, they were sad, sad that they had not destroyed the thing they feared.
Their guitars flaming, the star sailors laid waste to the lunar doormice colony, mistaking it for another thing, a thing they feared. Afterwards, they were sad, sad that they had not destroyed the thing they feared.
The Monkey & The Madman Dance All Night
Paul Roland - Danse Macabre (1987)
Further: After leaving the eyeball thing which the monkey ascertained was a god, whatever that is, he/it stepped sideways through a door inside of a small bronze mailbox and emerged on the deck of a flying leviathan of metal and gas, just in time for a midnight masquerade.
Further: After leaving the eyeball thing which the monkey ascertained was a god, whatever that is, he/it stepped sideways through a door inside of a small bronze mailbox and emerged on the deck of a flying leviathan of metal and gas, just in time for a midnight masquerade.
January 28, 2007
The Contract For The Contact Lens of God
The Residents - Double Shot (CD3 Single) (1989)
Continuing: When the monkey recovered from the dreamweapon's attack and the wonderful changes in his head (which he still didn't understand), he noticed a large man(?)monkeything with an eyeball for a head and two furless woman(?)monkies squatting before him. He was naturally curious, but somewhat frightened.
Continuing: When the monkey recovered from the dreamweapon's attack and the wonderful changes in his head (which he still didn't understand), he noticed a large man(?)monkeything with an eyeball for a head and two furless woman(?)monkies squatting before him. He was naturally curious, but somewhat frightened.
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