Gumball - Wisconsin Hayride (1992)
"Thus, the humble parentheses is the strongest particle of punctuation in the universe," softly concluded the mild-eyed wild-haired big-eared thin-lipped hook-nosed raw-skinned long-necked stoop-shouldered hamstrung withered pocked scarified and ultimately terrifyingly believable speaker. The applause began slowly, like rain waiting permission to fall, but shortly subsumed the theatre with its massive pulse. The people were amused.
May 22, 2007
That Ol' Wrong Side Of The Bed Strikes Again
Social Distortion - Prison Bound (1988)
He was confronted by his own reflection, in fact hundreds of reflections of himself, but as far as he could tell, backed by no mirrors. He walked through the center of the deserted town square with dozens and dozens and dozens of himself walking along beside him. He could see reflections of his reflections in Main St. store windows. They all waved at him when he waved at them, or at himself - it really was confusing. His mother had warned him there would be days like this, but he never truly believed her.
He was confronted by his own reflection, in fact hundreds of reflections of himself, but as far as he could tell, backed by no mirrors. He walked through the center of the deserted town square with dozens and dozens and dozens of himself walking along beside him. He could see reflections of his reflections in Main St. store windows. They all waved at him when he waved at them, or at himself - it really was confusing. His mother had warned him there would be days like this, but he never truly believed her.
Something I Saw I Guy Do Once, Just Once
Sally Timms - It Says Here (1995)
Sally Timms - Cowboy Sally (1997)
She was a long cool drink of water, that's for sure, with a straw hat, but try sucking on that thing and you'd really be in for it.
Sally Timms - Cowboy Sally (1997)
She was a long cool drink of water, that's for sure, with a straw hat, but try sucking on that thing and you'd really be in for it.
May 21, 2007
The Storms Go On Forever Like They Should
The Jazz Butcher - A Scandal In Bohemia ~ Sex & Travel (1986)
The one-eyed boy, wearing the scarlet patch which covered his empty socket, sang a song like no song the audience had ever heard before. Hours and hours it went on, telling a story, saying nothing, making them laugh and weep, sometimes a roar of sunshine and sometimes a cold whisper of space and stars. Candles and torches and upended flashlights lit the stage and its wrack of a thousand operas thrown up by the recent storms, the storms that drove them all here this night, together like they would never have been in the world outside. Some held hands with strangers, lay heads on foreign shoulders, smiled and felt forgiven for the first time in their lives. Some held themselves alone, vibrating fiercely, overjoyed but still afraid of this new sensation. They all, all, never wanted the night to end. Outside, the storms continued.
The one-eyed boy, wearing the scarlet patch which covered his empty socket, sang a song like no song the audience had ever heard before. Hours and hours it went on, telling a story, saying nothing, making them laugh and weep, sometimes a roar of sunshine and sometimes a cold whisper of space and stars. Candles and torches and upended flashlights lit the stage and its wrack of a thousand operas thrown up by the recent storms, the storms that drove them all here this night, together like they would never have been in the world outside. Some held hands with strangers, lay heads on foreign shoulders, smiled and felt forgiven for the first time in their lives. Some held themselves alone, vibrating fiercely, overjoyed but still afraid of this new sensation. They all, all, never wanted the night to end. Outside, the storms continued.
Mind And Body? No Problem!
Bevis Frond - Tryptich (1988)
Without even realizing it, Hugo solved one of the oldest and most difficult mathematical puzzles ever invented. Not bad for a shoe-shine boy from Black Earth, Wisconsin, he thought, as he again cautiously lifted the worn corner of his living room rug to peek at the swirling interdimensional maw his fever-inspired contortions had accidentally created. He pushed another squirrel into it, just for fun.
Without even realizing it, Hugo solved one of the oldest and most difficult mathematical puzzles ever invented. Not bad for a shoe-shine boy from Black Earth, Wisconsin, he thought, as he again cautiously lifted the worn corner of his living room rug to peek at the swirling interdimensional maw his fever-inspired contortions had accidentally created. He pushed another squirrel into it, just for fun.
May 20, 2007
Il Duce Made The Pages Turn Timely, Indeed
Swans - Love of Life (1992)
It was, undoubtedly, by far, the largest land crab Michael had ever seen. And clearly the most literate, in a bohemian way, if the "I'd Rather Be Reading Bukowski" bumper sticker on its house-sized shell was any indication. Of course, that could always be laid to poetically-minded juvenile delinquents - Michael was well-aware of how much they delighted in such tricks! Only a fortnight earlier, his own vintage, converted, goat-drawn Volkswagen Beetle had been plastered overnight with thousands of tiny magnetic buttons, transforming the Reich-inspired auto into a perfect likeness of Benito Mussolini, the greatest Italian novelist of the 20th century. Michael had been reluctant to remove the rather inspired graffiti, but his wife's repeated refusal to be carted around town in "Some foreigner's head!" eventually persuaded him.
It was, undoubtedly, by far, the largest land crab Michael had ever seen. And clearly the most literate, in a bohemian way, if the "I'd Rather Be Reading Bukowski" bumper sticker on its house-sized shell was any indication. Of course, that could always be laid to poetically-minded juvenile delinquents - Michael was well-aware of how much they delighted in such tricks! Only a fortnight earlier, his own vintage, converted, goat-drawn Volkswagen Beetle had been plastered overnight with thousands of tiny magnetic buttons, transforming the Reich-inspired auto into a perfect likeness of Benito Mussolini, the greatest Italian novelist of the 20th century. Michael had been reluctant to remove the rather inspired graffiti, but his wife's repeated refusal to be carted around town in "Some foreigner's head!" eventually persuaded him.
May 18, 2007
Truth , Justice, And Our Way Or The Highway - $1.19/LB
Jacobites - Howling Good Times (1994)
"Nationalistic tendencies" - the panel of extremely qualified, eminent, sane, board-certified, bespectacled, sometimes bearded, laced, probably real experts was saying - "are only natural expressions of love of own's country, one's fatherland if we can invent a phrase, and are purely wholesome and justifiable seen in such a light. This is our considered opinion." At this the panel nodded as one and slid slowly and simultaneously underneath the long panelled bench, shiny wigs last to be seen. As they disappeared, unaware the cameras still ran and the microphones buzzed, there was heard a whispered "Do ya think they bought it?" and a round of answering sniggers.
"Nationalistic tendencies" - the panel of extremely qualified, eminent, sane, board-certified, bespectacled, sometimes bearded, laced, probably real experts was saying - "are only natural expressions of love of own's country, one's fatherland if we can invent a phrase, and are purely wholesome and justifiable seen in such a light. This is our considered opinion." At this the panel nodded as one and slid slowly and simultaneously underneath the long panelled bench, shiny wigs last to be seen. As they disappeared, unaware the cameras still ran and the microphones buzzed, there was heard a whispered "Do ya think they bought it?" and a round of answering sniggers.
One Must Be Ever So Careful, Here And Always Over There, Over There
True Believers - True Believers (1986) and
True Believers - True Believers (1987)
The typewriter was a dangerous weapon. Milton knew this instinctively. He had dared approach it only obliquely to date, at angles impossible for the geometricians to define and label. He believed it unaware of him and of his intentions. Clad in his special homemade armor (paper plates scavenged from the bins behind the local ribbery and pasta joint, stitched with stale spaghetti), today he chose a new approach, circling in from several miles out and taking full advantage of natural cover - small children, goats, surprised milkmen - to achieve his final goal, the fruit of years of research and hard mental effort. The filthy and tattered "True Detective" subscription form trembled in his pale hands.
True Believers - True Believers (1987)
The typewriter was a dangerous weapon. Milton knew this instinctively. He had dared approach it only obliquely to date, at angles impossible for the geometricians to define and label. He believed it unaware of him and of his intentions. Clad in his special homemade armor (paper plates scavenged from the bins behind the local ribbery and pasta joint, stitched with stale spaghetti), today he chose a new approach, circling in from several miles out and taking full advantage of natural cover - small children, goats, surprised milkmen - to achieve his final goal, the fruit of years of research and hard mental effort. The filthy and tattered "True Detective" subscription form trembled in his pale hands.
Seen From The Church Belfry, It Was A Sight!
Jon Langford - Skull Orchard (1997)
The circus strongman, the flying leopard act, the incredibly tall midget family and the invisible visible boy drove the old yellow hearse into town on a lark, looking for a fight you might say, never expecting what one small boy, a slingshot, and a thimbleful of pink poster paint could do. The weekly paper ran a story next edition about mysterious noises in the night, a possible alien invasion, and the courage of its local son.
The circus strongman, the flying leopard act, the incredibly tall midget family and the invisible visible boy drove the old yellow hearse into town on a lark, looking for a fight you might say, never expecting what one small boy, a slingshot, and a thimbleful of pink poster paint could do. The weekly paper ran a story next edition about mysterious noises in the night, a possible alien invasion, and the courage of its local son.
May 17, 2007
May 16, 2007
It Was Least Expected, That's For Sure
The Romulans - Flight of... (1993)
Basking in the shallows, flapping wings idly, eyestalks extruded, camo-stripes rippling like shadows, the vastly intelligent but incredibly boring and bulbous (in its last, still-to-come and infinitely more venal state of metamorphosis), alien overlord of the Earth thought thoughts unlike any thoughts ever thought on Earth. Mostly about candy.
Basking in the shallows, flapping wings idly, eyestalks extruded, camo-stripes rippling like shadows, the vastly intelligent but incredibly boring and bulbous (in its last, still-to-come and infinitely more venal state of metamorphosis), alien overlord of the Earth thought thoughts unlike any thoughts ever thought on Earth. Mostly about candy.
Soon, Soon, The Master Plan Will Be Revealed
Long Ryders - BBC Radio One In Concert (1994)
Blankets, blankets, blankets, rang the cry through the city! All night the shirtless men and the pantsless women ran through the sullen streets, stirring the dust and crying for blankets! The mayor and his mistress were first aghast but upon investigating threw off shirt and pantaloons and joined the joyous crowd. Blankets, blankets, blankets, rang the cry through the city!
Blankets, blankets, blankets, rang the cry through the city! All night the shirtless men and the pantsless women ran through the sullen streets, stirring the dust and crying for blankets! The mayor and his mistress were first aghast but upon investigating threw off shirt and pantaloons and joined the joyous crowd. Blankets, blankets, blankets, rang the cry through the city!
What Happens When You Own A Pocketwatch Of Lead
Johnny Thunders - (New) Too Much Junkie Business (1990)
Punctuality, never Sister's strong point. In fact, she had on more than one occasion missed her own death. This was of course immortalized in song and story by better than average songwriters and almost readable novelists. Two films (the latter a remake of the former or the former of the latter, Sister could never be certain, having been late for both premieres) were made, by substandard and genuis directors, at the same time. The same actress also portrayed Sister in both films, as younger and even younger versions of the real Sister. Finally, having accidently viewed both films simultaneously, Sister decided the actress was a better Sister than Sister herself, so she became the actress and was never late again.
Punctuality, never Sister's strong point. In fact, she had on more than one occasion missed her own death. This was of course immortalized in song and story by better than average songwriters and almost readable novelists. Two films (the latter a remake of the former or the former of the latter, Sister could never be certain, having been late for both premieres) were made, by substandard and genuis directors, at the same time. The same actress also portrayed Sister in both films, as younger and even younger versions of the real Sister. Finally, having accidently viewed both films simultaneously, Sister decided the actress was a better Sister than Sister herself, so she became the actress and was never late again.
May 11, 2007
Oh, Monster, Come To Bed, With Springs For A Heart
Soul Asylum - Made To Be Broken (1986)
"It is conventional to call 'monster' any blending of dissonant elements. I call 'monster' every original inexhaustible beauty."
- Alfred Jarry, L’Ymagier (1894)
(Note: This, too, is a textual repost with new music, the original music post now being but a memory, at the request of the artist).
"It is conventional to call 'monster' any blending of dissonant elements. I call 'monster' every original inexhaustible beauty."
- Alfred Jarry, L’Ymagier (1894)
(Note: This, too, is a textual repost with new music, the original music post now being but a memory, at the request of the artist).
A Night Of Passionate Pumpkin Love Trumps Death
Sonny Sharrock - Guitar (1986)
Sonia crawled out of the jack-o-lantern's mouth, gripping the giant carven teeth to gain the leverage she needed. It had been a wonderful adventure overall, she thought, smiling to herself, knocking off bits of hardened wax, seeds the size of her hand and stringing pumpkin guts. Yes, there, the raygun lay just where she'd left it. A minute more and she'd be her proper size again. No problems with buttons too big to push - she'd read all the stories. She pulled the remote control from her pocket but hesitated just a moment too long, looking up to see just what had made the huge winged shadow...
(Note: This is a textual repost with new music, the original music post now being but a memory, at the request of the artist).
Sonia crawled out of the jack-o-lantern's mouth, gripping the giant carven teeth to gain the leverage she needed. It had been a wonderful adventure overall, she thought, smiling to herself, knocking off bits of hardened wax, seeds the size of her hand and stringing pumpkin guts. Yes, there, the raygun lay just where she'd left it. A minute more and she'd be her proper size again. No problems with buttons too big to push - she'd read all the stories. She pulled the remote control from her pocket but hesitated just a moment too long, looking up to see just what had made the huge winged shadow...
(Note: This is a textual repost with new music, the original music post now being but a memory, at the request of the artist).
May 9, 2007
It Was A Voice That Spoke In Many Ways
Throwing Muses - Throwing Muses (1986)
"When you have shot and killed a man you have in some measure clarified your attitude toward him. You have given a definite answer to a definite problem. For better or worse you have acted decisively.
In a way, the next move is up to him."
- R. A. Lafferty, "Golden Gate" (1982)
"When you have shot and killed a man you have in some measure clarified your attitude toward him. You have given a definite answer to a definite problem. For better or worse you have acted decisively.
In a way, the next move is up to him."
- R. A. Lafferty, "Golden Gate" (1982)
He Should Have, But He Didn't, So It Happened
John Lurie - Stranger Than Paradise & The Resurrection of Albert Ayler (1985)
Eddie picked at the scab and kept picking at the scab, which is never a good idea, nor very sanitary, under the best of conditions. But this scab was larger than the average scab, oh, maybe three feet in length, and ran like a zipper across his torso from his left nipple diagonally over his belly button (an outie, of course) and over to his right thigh. With a final flick, he removed the last of the scar tissue. A moment later, the proud flesh of his ungainly and unsightly wound burst apart due to internal pressure and Eddie died an agonizing and stupid death. The end.
Eddie picked at the scab and kept picking at the scab, which is never a good idea, nor very sanitary, under the best of conditions. But this scab was larger than the average scab, oh, maybe three feet in length, and ran like a zipper across his torso from his left nipple diagonally over his belly button (an outie, of course) and over to his right thigh. With a final flick, he removed the last of the scar tissue. A moment later, the proud flesh of his ungainly and unsightly wound burst apart due to internal pressure and Eddie died an agonizing and stupid death. The end.
Playing Peek-A-Boo With Far Away Eyes
Nels Cline Trio - Silencer (1992)
For seven billion years the little star had quietly and efficiently (it prided itself on its efficiency) burned its hydrogen and lit up its little corner of the universe. Then, one day, it felt a tickling sensation, an irritation, an unpleasant feeling of being watched. Not sure from where this new feeling originated but not liking it in the least, the little star quietly folded space and time around itself, making it appear to vanish utterly.
Back on Earth, some astronomers and physicists were astounded. And some strongly religious folk were moved to kill themselves (and a few billion non-believers).
Eventually, the star came back out, decided the annoying presence was gone, and resumed its sweet hydrogen burn.
For seven billion years the little star had quietly and efficiently (it prided itself on its efficiency) burned its hydrogen and lit up its little corner of the universe. Then, one day, it felt a tickling sensation, an irritation, an unpleasant feeling of being watched. Not sure from where this new feeling originated but not liking it in the least, the little star quietly folded space and time around itself, making it appear to vanish utterly.
Back on Earth, some astronomers and physicists were astounded. And some strongly religious folk were moved to kill themselves (and a few billion non-believers).
Eventually, the star came back out, decided the annoying presence was gone, and resumed its sweet hydrogen burn.
May 6, 2007
It's Only One Man's Fantasy
Coffee Sergeants - Moonlight Towers (1993)
The President put pen to the last official statement of his elected tenure and turned to the vast bulletproof windows of the newly remodeled Oval Office, the better to appreciate the long line of gallows that stretched across the green White House lawn and disappeared into the distance, to end at the steps of the Capitol Building. Even now the hooded and bewildered members of Congress were shuffling up the rough wooden steps, crying out in anger and fear. Nine black robed figures already swayed in the cold January wind.
The President put pen to the last official statement of his elected tenure and turned to the vast bulletproof windows of the newly remodeled Oval Office, the better to appreciate the long line of gallows that stretched across the green White House lawn and disappeared into the distance, to end at the steps of the Capitol Building. Even now the hooded and bewildered members of Congress were shuffling up the rough wooden steps, crying out in anger and fear. Nine black robed figures already swayed in the cold January wind.
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